This Week on the Internets (for 22 June 2009)

I was told recently by my grandmother that “who needs the Internets, all that’s on there is porn and jokes”.  Although this may far and away be the case – and quite the statement from a woman who doesn’t own a computer – I will attempt to politely differ and provide below what else worthwhile that you may find (or have found) out here besides Jenna Jameson and the latest zinger on what the Ayatollah, Farrah Fawcett and The King of Pop have in common.

We’ll probably start doing this every week.

On the NBA …

First, surprise!  Ricky Rubio appears to be dissatisfied (or constrained by his ridiculous contract?) and may be spurning the Timberwolves in favor of another summer or a few backpacking in Europe.  If so, net value of the Wolves trade to get the No. 5 pick from the Wizards?  The remarkable sum of losing Randy Foye, adding two funny looking guys from the former Soviet bloc and everybody’s favorite Syracuse grad Etan Thomas to bolster the front court, getting slapped in the face, and using another pick (No. 6) on a guard because you’re not sure where exactly you stand there.  SPORTSbyBROOKS with this and other tidbits in a pretty good NBA draft review.

Vince Carter joins Ron Jeremy in Orlando, near his hometown of Daytona Beach, a city with the recognition of holding the longest consecutive streak of Bike Weeks in the history of the world.  Coming from the Nets with Ryan Anderson, the Magic do give up a notable trio of budding talent in Rafer Alston, Tony Battie and Courtney Lee but have to immediately return in 2009-2010 as favorites in the East with the addition of Carter.

The best source for Twitter-related news, TechCrunch seems to have hired somebody with the designated role to follow Shaq’s tweets and that person (MG Siegler) believes that Shaq found out on Twitter that he had been traded to the Cleveland Cavaliers this week, citing his feed, which read “I didn’t hear dat yet” on June 24 after a THE_REAL_SHAQ followed asked “is it true u a CLEVELAND CAVALIER”.  On a side note, sometimes I wonder if we are headed squarely back toward the human era of grunts and informal communication as nobody seems to really care much about “the rules” (e.g. grammar, capitalization, spelling) anymore.  Or maybe I’m just old school.

On the MLB …

John Smoltz got smacked around in his first outing after returning from a shoulder injury; the former Cy Young winner and budding quatrogenerian apparently nervous in his much anticipated return against the Nationals.

My favorite news of a busy week, that Cubs catcher Geovany Soto tested positive during the World Baseball Classic for a drug that rumored to vastly enhance your ability to sit on the couch for 4-5 hours at a time, eat whole boxes of Hot and Spicy Cheez-Its and wander through life with half open eyelids.  Jake, what’s your opinion on this? My favorite part is that the early reports always say “failed a drug test”, which we assume means steroids, and then we stop listening and say to ourselves “they must just all be doing it” only to miss the fact that he was just enjoying a bit of ganja somewhere outside of Mexico City in the midst of what continues to look like a civil war south of the border.

On the NFL …

Limited news right now, but you can always count on T.O. for a story.  The former Cowboys wide receiver singling out Cowboys quarterback Tony Romo for a lack of leadership skills now that he is safely in Buffalo.

Of course, plenty of other news, from a franchise tender for Julius Peppers in Charlotte to massive amount of free-flowing cash for “football” players in Europe, but we’ll leave it at that for now.

Enjoy, and have a good weekend.