The so-called Talented Mr. Roto, though I continue to question the adjective there, at least never ceases to amaze in one talent: the ability to take the hobby of fantasy sports commentary to another level, making a job out of such commentary, without really ever demonstrating any differentiated knowledge of the subject.
Normally I tend to avoid Matthew Berry, but apparently he chatted for a “record” 13 hours, 12 minutes yesterday, which somehow qualifies as a headline on ESPN (See Full Chat Here). Thousands profess hatred of him, yet I guess he did manage to sustain a decent rhythm of questions and answers over a period longer than I’ve ever consecutively worked in my life. But I, conversely, have another job as I write, all the while creepily looking over my shoulder, whereas he does this for a living without even being all that good at it. Genius. Cue jealousy/hatred theme.
The biggest wool-over-eyes heist… Ever? Maybe. I mean, he’s admitted to having no other resources than the Internet and baseball statistics to make the claims that he does. So in reality, anyone could do it. Hence Cubicle GM.
The main reason I am even posting this is to highlight a few hilarious comments made about him by readers/chat participants. Maybe they’re spawned by pure jealousy, maybe in response to his pathetic positioning as a close friend of Bill Simmons whilst on the opposite coast, maybe because it doesn’t make sense that an “expert” could be so notoriously inaccurate in his line of work. Maybe it’s his budding soap opera career (keep watching, you’ll see him). In the midst of all this, there is this funny phenomenon where people who claim to hate Matt Berry can’t help but read his every word.
No matter the reason, part of me credits his lack of censorship here and part of me is convinced that he just gets a kick out of the fact that he has somehow made a career talking fantasy sports at the biggest sports brand on the globe, admittedly without being any better at it than anyone else. I mean, it’s not like the guy wins his league every year or something.
A few highlights below:
All Attractive Women (Everywhere, Globe): You have no shot. Just wanted to get that out of the way. Carry on.
roger: katy, texas: Mathew how does it feel to get paid just to guess on fantasy sports? You arent even that good at guessing.
Mark (St. Paul, MN): When was the last time you were right about anything?
Joe (Boston): What came first, Matthew Berry the writer, or Matthew Berry the fantasy expert?
Steve(Boston) : You lost me when you let American Idol slip in. And you wonder why you’re a single guy trying to set a chat record
Adam: 6 questions 0 answers..like talking to my wife
Joe (Hartford): Congratulations on a record no one outside of Bristol cares about
HELP MATT HELP (PLEASE): I need some advice on what could be a life changing decision. I’ve suspected for some time now that my girlfriend has been having an affair. The usual signs. Phone rings, I answer, someone hangs up. She started going out ‘with the girls’ a lot recently, although when I ask which girls it is always “Just some friends from work, you don’t know them”. I always look out for her taxi coming home but she always walks down the drive although I can hear a car setting off. As if she has got out of the car round the corner. Why? Is it not a taxi? I once picked her mobile up just to see what time it was and she went beserk and screamed that I should never touch her phone again and why was I checking up on her. Anyway, I have never approached the subject with my g/f. I think deep downI just didn’t want to know the truth but last night she went out again and I decided to check on her. I decided I was going to hide behind my car which would give me a view of the whole street so I could see which car she gets out of. It was whilst crouched behind my car that I noticed rust around my rear wheel arch. So what should I do? Should I take it into a body repair shop or should I buy some stuff from Autozone and try to repair it myself?
Zak (Tucson): You owe me 12 hours of my life back, Mr. Berry.
Didn’t he also say in the chat that he has 10 to 12 teams per season? Who couldn’t get at least one 3rd place finish with that many teams?
Karabell’s better, but I absolutely agree, they read BP, conditioning/workout/local anecdotes about players and project like they have true foresight like anyone else except it’s their job.
The Love/Hate column is similar to picking NCAA Tournament winners based on color, fight song or stats that might actually matter, all being mostly a crapshoot or completely obvious.
Yeah, even Karabell admits to playing in a bunch of leagues, too… His blog today talked about rooting for A-Rod to come back quick since he “owns him in soooo many leagues.” No transliteration there; that’s what he said, “soooo” included. I wonder how he settled on five “o”‘s.
I’m firmly against that (many leagues, not o’s in an overstated “so”, but I could probably draw you up an opinion in a few hours). One league, maybe two. I tend to do one personal and one work, just so I have something to talk to these people about.
Haha…these people. I’d get bored going through the motion of picking up Player X 6 or 7 different times in one day. Hopefully they make VBA script to automate that stuff.